Ok, so now I am thinking more about death, heaven, hell, and the soul. I was starting to think that I have never really grieved. I have never felt death that close. But then again I wonder.
The first funeral I remember was the funeral for my great grandfather - my dad's grandpa. I think we sang "Mansions Will Glisten on the Streets of Glory" at the funeral, my dad on his guitar, my sister singing, and me on the violin (note: no reference to fiddle - read the the book mentioned in the previous post). But I never new my great grandfather. No real sense of loss.
The next taste of death, and I may be messing up the orders of these chronologically, was the passing of Dr. Dave Hildebrand and his wife. Dr. Dave inspired me. He was our orchestra conductor. He encouraged me to do "special numbers" while he played the piano as my backup. He taught me how to play rook. And it is his leadership style, I think, that I mostly closely mirror more than anyone else: a tremendous musician with the gift and skill to inspire amateurs to learn to play together and make beautiful worship. His sudden death was a shock, to put it mildly. I was in grade 11 I think. John, their son, was on our football team, and I knew Tim as a college kid I looked up to. Dr. Dave was buried in the cemetery at the end of our street. I grieved, but not too deeply, I don't think. I try to honor him, in how I work with people in music and I do think about him from time to time, especially when I feel like complaining about my situation or when the music I am involved with is sucking. Mainly because I never EVER heard him complain once and if anyone had reason to, it was him. Incidentally, I received the scholarship in his name every year I was in Bible College. I am very grateful.
I think it was my grandma who passed away next. I think it was my freshman year in college. I think this because my grandma came to live with my parents and I don't remember a lot about when she was there. I think I was in the dorm. I think I wanted to avoid the situation, probably because it made me uncomfortable. My grandma was sick and my mom was taking care of her in her last days. My mom was the one that carried the whole weight of that. I am sorry that I stayed so distant in that time. My only memory of that time after was of the viewing. We were there with my mom's family and the funeral director left us there with my grandma for an awful long time. We cried and grieved, like we thought we should. But that didn't take long. Awkward silence followed. Then snickers. And before long, we in stitches, for no particular reason. Probably because of the awkwardness of it.
Then there was Josh. He was my best friend while my family lived in northern Manitoba. After we moved, we kept in touch. We wrote letters and sent tapes of our song ideas - he was an amazing musician. But then, the letters and tapes traversed our provinces less frequently. I went back to visit him once. Then, we just lost touch. There was thread of connection through his parents friendship with my parents and his sister's friendship with my sister. That was about it. And it was through those thin connections that I got word he was struggling with schizophrenia. Like the "good" friend I was, I didn't do anything to contact him. Nothing. A heavy regret I carry to this day. And it was through those thin connections that I heard he had passed away.
We went to the funeral in Winkler MB, Angela, my parents and I. There were so many people I watched it all from a tent outside. I sobbed like a baby. And sadly it wasn't tears for him, it was my guilt and shame for not reconnecting with him. It was the "only ifs" that stung. But, as little as I know about grieving, I think that may be part of the package cause I think I've hit different stages in the process at various times. Now, if I cry, it is because a mother and father lost a son, a brother and two sisters lost a brother, I have lost a friend and this world has lost a magnificent man.
I have heard a bit of his God journey near the end of his life. He lived for God but it was a struggle. . .
(A pause. I am just sitting here, remembering)
So that is really the extent of my close brushes with death. I am not sure why I wrote that all, but you may be surprised to know that there is happiness for me in writing this. It has been good remembering. It has been good for my soul.
Saturday, December 30, 2006
Goodness in remembering
Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die
I just finished reading Everybody Wants To Go To Heaven But Nobody Wants To Die or the eschatology of bluegrass by David Crowder and Mike Hogan. In fact, I finished it within three minutes of writing this sentence and the one previous - all this to say, the following thoughts will be my gut reaction.
Well first of all, I don't contemplate dying, the soul, heaven or hell much. I think about it occasionally, in different forms but I don't contemplate it. Which surprises me cause death has brushed my family and friends, I co-lead a church that "should" be concerned with the state of man's soul, I have conducted a few funerals and have committed the dead to the dust of the earth (graveside service).
When I think about "how I think about" death, it usually is in the context of: "God, it would suck if Angela died" or "what would I do if one of my boyz died" or "what would life be like for Angela if I died" and then I don't want to think about those things anymore. But then I do, but the thoughts are usually accompanied by an ache and I think the ache is my understanding that death is a reality. The ache is that knowledge that I really don't know how long Angela, the boyz or I will continue to draw breath. That I am not in control of that and at it could be at any time I may loose someone. The ache is also the realization that I don't deserve life (this may need some explanation but for now, I am talking about the sin-state of man) and though I am thankful for it, it can be taken. And what this all boils down to then, is the fear of what comes next.
You see, the Bible is not really clear as to what comes next. That's what these two guys want us to know: that no one really knows what the soul is, and what happens to it after we die. Yeah, we have our theories: we don't really have a soul; that we have a soul but it dies when the body dies; when you die, your soul goes to sleep, that when the body dies, the soul leaves the body and resides in the presence of God; that the soul leaves and spends some time in purgatory (place where the soul cleanses itself before final judgement; and more theories I don't care to explain (p. 172-176).
Honestly, I don't know why I shared that in particular. I think what I was trying to get to is that Christians have spent little time thinking about such things and as a result, we paint for ourselves a misguided picture of heaven:- It will be better
The authors point out that very little of this is actually in scripture.
- There will be no problems
- There will be no sickness
- It will be peaceful
- We will be in the presence of God and/or Christ
- The cripple will be healed
- We will see friends and family that have died before us
- We will be eternal
- There will be humor
- People in heaven will be recognizable as they were in life
- There will be Angels
p. 176
Now that I typed that, I can't remember why I brought that up.
Ok, so I guess the point of the book, without giving it away is that we do have a soul, we will all feel the weight of death, we all will die, but because of the death of the human son of God, WE WIN! Death has no victory!
There is more to it than that of course. . . They talk a lat about bluegrass . . .
It may be interesting to note that David Crowder released their album A Collision, which is all about the struggle with death, long before they thought of writing this book. In fact, the death of Kyle Lake came shortly after the release of the album and it is his death (close friend of David and Mike) which had a huge influence in writing the book. And it was Kyle Lake who was instrumental in seeing the A Collision album released before he died.
If you haven't checked out the album, you should. It is weird - a fantastic piece of art in my opinion. And now I understand and appreciate that album so much more after reading the book.
And like the album, the book is weird too. It has insecure humor, weird stories, IM conversations, illustrations, and lots of footnotes. If you are an academic, probably not the book for you (they reference Wikipedia quite a lot).
So those are my gut reactions. Perhaps I will write more as I ponder more.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Theological leanings
I took this test today, inspired by Marc.
You scored as Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan. You are an evangelical in the Wesleyan tradition. You believe that God's grace enables you to choose to believe in him, even though you yourself are totally depraved. The gift of the Holy Spirit gives you assurance of your salvation, and he also enables you to live the life of obedience to which God has called us. You are influenced heavly by John Wesley and the Methodists.
Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan
71% Emergent/Postmodern
61% Fundamentalist
50% Charismatic/Pentecostal
46% Neo orthodox
43% Roman Catholic
39% Modern Liberal
39% Reformed Evangelical
32% Classical Liberal
29%
What's your theological worldview?
created with QuizFarm.com
I am not totally sure how to respond. This is the first time I took this test. Perhaps in time, I will take it again to see how I change, or rather, my theology changes.
I thought it was interesting that I scored as high as I did in the "Fundamentalist" category. I'm not sure that that means. My excuse is that fundamentalism is not all bad.
I think being in the C&MA (Christian & Missionary Alliance) has had quite the influence in me, especially in the Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan area.
Sunday, December 24, 2006
I see, said the blind man to the deaf lady . . .
With the holiday season upon us, I've had more time to do nothing. And what does a guy do when he has nothing to do? Of course, he watches TV.
So, I have watched some pretty random shows lately. So random, I can't remember what they were called, but what I found interesting about a number of them is that they like to do this narration thing. - that in between dialogue, a voice explaines what is going on. It is actually what kept me watching. Not because it enhanced the story but quite the opposite. It's oddness just kept me glued.
Well, I turned to a random show tonight and it too had this narration thing going on. I had some sort of thought like "not another one! How many shows like this can the viewing public handle?" Then another thought struck me: "maybe this is not really for the viewing public. Maybe this is some sort of feature for the visually impaired." But surely, technology had not advanced this far had it?
I decided to play with the audio settings on my TV. Right away I noticed they were set to "SAP". I have never known what SAP means but I have always been curious. In the past I settled for the "Stereo" setting beacuse I understood that and "mono" is boring. Well, you guessed it, when I set my audio back to stereo, the voice disappeared! Amazing. I actually thought these shows were starting a new trend and that I was at the forefront.
But I wonder, how does a visually impaired person go about changing the settings on their TV? I have the pleasure of good eyesight and even I didn't notice the settings were changed.
Point of the story: if you are ever bored and are watching a dull show on TV, turn your audio to "SAP" and close your eyes to really experience the show. It will come alive! No not really, but I bet you are tempted to try it, aren't you?
And hey, I'll save you some time: wikipedia says that SAP means Second Audio Program. Who? was to know they could broadcast more than one audio signal?
Apology?
So I feel that I must apologize. But why should I, this is my blog. Yeah, that's right - something in me feels apologetic about not posting for many days. But something else in feels that I shouldn't care. So which something should I listen to? I guess if I quit writing, people will stop coming by, so for that reason I should be more prudent.
And I guess this would be the paragraph where I write all my excuses for not blogging, but frankly, I am feeling too lazy to write any right now.
And this would be the paragraph where I tell you what has been going on in our lives but I'm not in the mood. I have actually been really tired of the internet and all that comes with it. I have been neglecting my email inbox(es) and only really hitting Google when I absolutely have to. I don't really know why that is, but sitting in front of a monitor doesn't appeal to me these days.
So now I have a week of almost nothing. My only responsibilities are those that come with having a family and making sure the Sunday Service happens next Sunday. All the other stuff is for fun. What I am saying is is that I imagine I'll have a lot of time to read, think and write and if that is the case, this blog will be a little more active.
Merry Christmas. I hope these days are filled with curiosity, awe and wonder . . .
Friday, December 15, 2006
When Christmas falls on Sunday
Ok, so I know it is a year late, but I just came across this blog by Scot McKnight on the issue of whether to cancel the Christmas day service (2005). Many churches did and many Christians didn't like it. I read this blog cause Rick and I were considering not having a Sunday Service at all this Christmas Eve. The board didn't go for it and that's fine, but I hope they at least thought about it. If you are interested in this kinda topic, read the full post here. But click "read more" under here to see a few excerpts from it.Here’s a fact consider: evidently, God thought a bundle of days were so important for the Jewish calendar that he gave laws both on the necessity of their annual celebration and he told them just how to celebrate that day. And Israel did just that.
Does that wet your whistle? Go to http://www.jesuscreed.org/?p=601 to reat the whole blog. Good stuff. . .
Here’s something else to think about: evidently the same God didn’t think the same of Christmas, for there are no legislations about keeping but one “holiday”: the Lord’s supper. . . .
Does the NT teach a Sunday morning worship service? Well, the evidence isn’t what some are making it out to be. We need to be fair here: there is a distinction between what is taught and what is mentioned or hinted at as something practiced. And there is no clear text legislating that Christians are to meet for worship on a Sunday morning.
And it ought to be observed that there is, whether some will admit it or not, no clear connection between Christian worship on a Sunday and the Sabbath. The Sabbath is a day of “rest” while the Sunday was a time of “worship.” (See here A.G. Shead, New Dict. of Bibl. Theol, 749-50.) Not one shred of evidence here. In fact, the Apostle Paul says in Col 2:16 that one’s judgment about Sabbaths ought to be kept to oneself – or at least it ought not to be used as an instrument of judgment. (I have a hard time, and you probably do too, thinking Paul is letting ordinary Christians render judgment about when they were to “attend worship.”)
... let me poke some in the eye here: what I’m reading is that there is too much identification of “worship” with Sunday morning and too much identification of “being the church” with “attending a Sunday morning service.” I find this pretty surprising in that so many are making the case, pretty solidly I think, that “church” is not something done on Sunday mornings but something we “are” and “are all through the week” – climaxing at the Lord’s table and in Sunday worship. . . .
. . . another issue involved for many churches: the performance nature of the Christmas Eve service is so intense that there is nothing left for another service. Again, you might fight hard against the “performance” level and concentration (cantata, musical, theatricals, whatever), but argue that that and not that churches have lost their soul if they cancel Christmas Sunday services.
In particular
I work with young people. If you do too, or have kids, or have friends who have kids, you may find this interesting. I am quoting from an article in a online magazine that I pay for called "Engage." It is the journal of youth culture put together by the Center for Parent/Youth Understanding (CPYU). The article is called "In Particular" and is written by the CPYU president, Walt Mueller. In the article he lists and explains "10 surprising things you need to know about youth culture." Here is his list:
1. Advertising is a powerful shaper of kids.It is for reason 10 that I work with young people. It is for reason 10 that I have no trouble bringing up my boys in this world. But those first 9 sure shape kids now adays.
2. Everything's happening at younger and younger ages.
3. They are engaging new media in new ways.
4. Family violence is rampant.
5. The nature of peer pressure has changed.
6. Materialism is a desirable lifestyle.
7. Oral sex is big.
8. Far too many kids depressed.
9. There's little difference between churched and un-churched kids.
10. In the midst of all this, children and teens are increasingly becoming more and more aware of their deep hunger for something more.
This article made me think about my middle-school kids and why they frustrate me so much. But I do have a lot of hope for them.
Each of these "surprising things" were discussed in the article, but this gives you a outline as to what shapes our kids. If you are interested in reading the whole article, let me know. I know I can get permission to distribute it.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
Women in Ministry
I'm doing some good reading this morning on Women in Ministry. I started with this blog post by Scott McKnight on 1 Timothy 2:8-15.
That led me to a paper writting by Dr. Franklin Pyles on the same text. Go here for that one.
Here is his conclusion:
Therefore, the passage does not forbid women being involved in the leadership of the church, nor does it forbid their teaching men the Word of God. Women should be allowed, on the basis of the New Testament, to be fully active in every part, and at every level of ministry, as were their first century counterparts. I conclude in concurrence with A. B. Simpson who wrote in reply to someone who complained about women preaching and teaching in the early Alliance that the issue was not that women taught, but what they taught. As long as they taught the truth, there is no reason to hinder them.This is timely because our church leadership (all guys) has been working through this issue - or rather the issue of women as elders. I love my church and it's leadership but this is one issue I am at odds with them. I believe women can be in leadership and it is unfortunate that our church doesn't allow it - we have some gifted women that are not allowed to use their gifts. I think we all loose out when we get in the way of God.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Hiatus
There are a number of reasons I have not posted anything here for the last 11 days. In case you don't know, you can click "Read more" underneath this line to read the rest of the story . . .
Let me walk you through what was:
Saturday, December 2
- Laura's Birthday breakfast at our house.
- Mammoth church board meeting. 8 hours, Pizza included
- Visit from an old friend, Marc. A refreshing visit. He was the first friend I ever had a memory of. We lost touch over the years but somehow, through blogging mostly, we have reconnected.
Sunday, December 3
- Church and all that comes with it
- Left Mackenzie with my parents
- Drove to Okanagan falls to meet up with friends - Halls and Moores
- We rented a huge condo for two nights to hang out and relax
- We watched a talk by Andy Stanely called "Cheating the church. Simply amazing. It's blogable but only if I can fit in the time.
- Spent our first night away from Mackenzie since Lukas was born
Monday, December 4
- More hanging out and relaxing
- Went to the hospital to visit Benj & Theressa and their new baby boy
- Watched a Wayne Cordero talk - another good one. Compliments Andy Stanely's
Tuesday, December 5
- More relaxing and hanging out
- Headed home to see pickup Mackenzie
- Did the worship thing at AWANA
- The retreat was sweet in the sense that we got to hang out with friends and spend some good
focused time with Lukas.
Wednesday, December 6
- Left at 6am in the Kenworth headed for Nisku (just south of Edmonton)
- Had on a 60' drilling apparatus. I think they called it a jib crane.
- Roads were ok through the mountains.
- Arrived on time but they weren't ready to unload me. Took about 4 hours.
- Got going again and ended up driving until 1:30am the next morning
Thursday, December 7
- Hit the road at 6am and headed to Brooks, AB
- Loaded up big round bales - 52, 000 lbs worth!
- Round bales are wide. 10 feet wide!
- Started for home with my over sized load and jittery nerves
- Made it to Kelowna by 11:30pm that night
Friday, December 8
- Headed up toward Big White Ski Resort at 7am
- The tractor unloaded me by pushing the bales off the other side - different.
- Hot home at 10:30am
- Hung out with my family till lunch
- Setup for our church's Christmas party all afternoon and into the evening
- Got insulted by our guest musician/singer
- Ate my turkey dinner with a sour taste in my mouth
- Led the party in some rousing Christmas Carols
- Crashed on the couch with Angela later that evening
Saturday, December 9
- Decided to "cheat the church" and skip men's breakfast to hang out with my family. I had seen
Mackenzie for a total of 4 hours in the past 6 days.
- Terry Switzer Trucking Party. We went to the Gausthous (or something German like that) in
Westbank
- I double my intake of escargot this year - I had two
- I had an amazing brie covered steak
- I'm glad I still drive truck for the very reason that I can go to a Christmas party still
Sunday, December 10
- Church and all that it contains including video and sound difficulties. A difficult morning that
way but a good morning none the less.
- Our first night at home in over a week that we could relax - just the two of us. Sweetness.
Monday, December 11
- Hung out at home with my family - it is my day off after all
- We picked out an cut down a Christmas tree.
- This is Mackenzie watching his dad cut down the tree
- Put the tree in the house.
- Another relaxing evening at home
Tuesday, December 12
- Laptop surgery day
- Took me most the morning to get the mobo out. One pesky screw was holding me up.
- Had the new power plug in, laptop working and all in one piece by 3:30pm
- Played Xbox with my junior high Xbox crew
- Sung the "Christingole" song at AWANA (last night of AWANA this year!!)
- Quartet practice after AWANA
- Angela picked up slurpees that we drank till we went to bed
Wednesday, December 13
- Mackenzie jumped into bed at 7:15am. I put on "Cars" and started blogging . . .
Friday, December 01, 2006
Bated Breath
Our lives changed in October: Robby handed us his roomate's DVD set of Lost: Season 1. . .
And, because we watched Lost and nothing else, I got behind on some of the other shows I had been following. I caught up to the rest of the world with Prison Break yesterday. That's a sweet show. Now I wait with bated breath for the next episode.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Dirty Rotter
I found you, you little . . .
The culprit is a broken power connector (see previous post). Now all I gotta do is order a new one on ebay, remove the old one and solder in the new one.
I told you that the last fall was not the last straw!
The last straw? NEVER!
So my laptop fell on the floor again. Maybe for the last time. Shortly after this incident, I found that my laptop had shut off - the power surge/shorting out kinda shut off. After a reboot, I saw that my power module wasn't supplying power to the laptop. I wasn't surprised - I've had to rewire it twice due to excessive use. I tore it apart and tried a more permanent fix which involved a lot of solder. When I plugged it into the laptop, it whistled in a way I cannot explain. I thought I may have soldered it wrong. Feeling beat, I started pricing out a new power supply. Before I commiting to buying one, I had to make sure it was the power supply. After fiddling, I almost admitted defeat. I powered up my laptop with the intention of aimlessly surfing the net while wondering what one does when he knows he only has a half hour of battery life left before it dies and he has to wait a week before a new power supply arrives. Only, the laptop shorted out, this time before my very eyes. After a few cycles of this, I deducted that the short is related to internal parts surrounding the thingy (good technical term) where the power supply plugs into my laptop. I proceeded to take things apart, only I didn't get very far cause I didn't know what I was doing.
So, the point of this post is that I have found a manual that tells me how to take my laptop apart and tonight, after the boys are in bed, I am going to do surgery. I am even thinking I may take a few pictures to document this feat, or defeat . . .
So, see ya on the other side.
Is this how it is supposed to work?
I thought the parents were supposed to read the book and then follow the steps to potty train their kids.
Let me tell you the way it has been working for us, since we have not yet read the book or really begun to train Mackenzie to use his potty: Mackenzie knows what the "potty book" is. About 10 minutes ago, he grabbed it off the shelf to look at the pictures. He then proceeded to make his way to the bathroom, remove his pants and diaper, sit down, continue reading the book and dribble a little. Yeah, all on his own. The hilarious part is that he grabs the potty training book to take with him to the bathroom. This is not the first time.
We are thinking we will leave him be and hopefully he will completely train himself, only, I don't think there are any pictures in there that show him how to wipe his bum. Guess you can't have it all.
Friday, November 24, 2006
Application
Where did this idea of Application come from? Where did we get the idea that we must "apply, apply, apply" the scriptures. I was having an intense conversation with someone over the beattudes, again, and this person was constantly saying: "but I gotta know how to apply it." He was taking each verse, such as "Blessed are the merciful for they will be shown mercy" and insisting that he needed to know how to apply it to his life.
Now I am not saying making applications are wrong but must we always read scripture with intention that we must apply what we read to our lives right now? The trouble for me is that I am still wrestling with the beattitudes. I feel that Jesus was stating a fact in this "sermon" rather than imploring that everone needs to be these things or else, know what I mean?"
So it is not that I am looking for an excuse to not be merciful, I definitely want to be that, but what I want to know is where did we get the idea that we must "apply" everything? Where did that notion come from? Who influenced our thinking this way?
Perhaps you may point to 2 Timothy 3:16 which says: "All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking,correcting and training in righteousness" and say that is why we must apply it. Ok. But must we make applications with such vigor?
I am just tired of having to respond by doing something all the time. I am weary of it. What I really want is for God to speak through the scriptures to tell me who I am. To tell me how much he loves me and values me. I don't get this when I read for application. I usually feel guilty that I don't measure up or could ever measure up. I seem to always read scripture through the lens of "so what should I do now?" And when I do that, I am overwhelmed with the weight of having to do something - usually something I can't do, by myself at least, or without the Holy Spirit, which is what I have end up trying to do.
So I think this tension in me - applying scripture vs. just listening to scripture - is a result of me being in the crossover between our modern and post-modern generations. The modern part of me tells me that I must measure up to a standard and do, do, do while the post-modern part of me wants to rebell agains that complusion. And for no particular reason that I can tell, other than I want to rebell. Or maybe it i wrong.
And where does this all bring me? No idea. If you've been confused by what you just read, I am more confused than you.
Monday, November 20, 2006
Quotes
2 sweet quotes I never want to forget:
"He is the God of deal with it now. Why? Simple. Because later is about me, and now is about everyone else." The Last Next Best. Mark Steele. Relevant Megazine. Nov/Dec 06 p. 56.
The bold is what I want to remember. There is a lot contained in that phrase. This speaks directly to my "always lookin to the future" complex.
The other quote I heard last night on that extreme homemakeover show. It's that one with Ty, I think his name is. The one where they basically build a house for well deserving family. The dad that died of cancer from yesterday's show was known to say "Lots to think about. Nothin to worry about."
Maybe I should add another quote, from scripture. It's one that I think is most often misunderstood. I'll throw it on the pile:
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phillipians 4:6-7 (NIV).
So you tell me, what is the common thread in these three quotes?
Friday, November 17, 2006
The Holiday
The photos of our holiday can be found here.
This is what happened (I'm gunna make this quick cause I don't have much time):
We flew into Regina Monday night. Got to the farm pretty late. The boys travelled fairly well. I always enjoy a good plane ride.
We hung low at the farm for a couple of days. Mackenzie loves his grandma and grandpa, his uncle Richard, and everything on the farm.
We visited my sister's family in Shamrock. Those are her two oldest boys on the combine tire, Curtis and Stephen. Yes, Mackenzie got a combine ride and his dad got to drive.
We played a lot there. It was fun. I saw Stephen's very first hockey game, ever. He did well. I predict a 1st round draft pick soon . . .
Back to the farm.
More hanging low - we like that.
I hung out with my friend Shawn Hiebert for a day in Swift Current (no relation). That lifted my spirits. I was feeling pretty discouraged until then - I don't know how to relax and get my mind off of work . . .
Kristin Clark drove up from Saskatoon after that. She spent 2 days at the farm I think. It was great to see her again.
I was able to haul some hay bales via. semi truck for Angela's dad. I was happy to be able to contribute to the farm.
Angela got sick.
Then the boys got sick.
Then I got sick.
It could have been that we didn't get one full night's sleep throughout the whole holiday, or not, but I'd like to blame it on that.
That's right. No sleep, or very little at least.
I helped Richard finish Star Wars: Jedi Knight/Jedi Outcast or whatever it was called. We also managed to do some old school LAN gaming. That's always a blast.
We watched some movies.
We played with the kids.
We drank a lot of coffee.
We had waffles - twice!
We ate a turkey dinner.
Those are the highlights, I guess.
I didn't read much. I was disappointed in myself for that.
I was hoping to blog - dial up and the fact that I wasn't in the mood kept me from it.
There ya go. Check out the pictures. And this is a reminder that you can always find our photos near the top of the page on the right. "Sets" are basically photo albums and "tags" are sections or grouped pages of photos in the photo albums. For example: "Nov 06 Holiday" photos are found in the "Family" set. If you want to look at all the photos in our "Family" photo album, click on the set.
So yeah. That's our holiday summed up.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Just when you think things are going well . . .
Just when we thought things were going well . . . we get slammed with a $256 phone bill!!!!
Yeah, it turns out that Collect Calls from the US to BC are over $3 a minute!!! Who knew?
A few weeks ago, you may remember that I was in Spokane Washington for a Promise Keepers conference. One reason I know I don't really have to go to these conferences is because I love my wife. A lot. And because I love her, I need to talk to her. And because I loved her that week end, I called her that weekend. Four times as a matter of fact. Two times for 7 minutes each. That was not too bad cause I only got charged $22.60 for each 7 minute call. One night I talked with Angela for 27 minutes. K, I understand that the longer you talk, the more money it costs but does it have to cost $57.50? Need more proof that I love my wife? I submit to you the fourth piece of evidence: a 37 minute call totalling $75.60!!!!
I should have used my cell phone. Last year we only got dinged $70. I thought making a collect land line call would be cheaper. Boy was I wrong!
Moral of the story: Don't eat chicken noodle soup with a fork. . . . . in Spokane while talking on the phone with your wife - it's a waste of time AND money trying to spear those little buggers!
It begins at Creation
One of the best things I have read in a long time:
... Perhaps the most common imbalance in American evangelicalism is to overemphasize the Fall. Consider the typical evangelistic message: "You're a sinner; you need to be saved." What could be wrong with that? Of course, it's true that we are sinners, but notice that the message starts with the Fall instead of Creation. By beginning with the theme of sin, it implies that our essential identity consists in being guilty sinners, deserving of divine punishment. Some Christian literature goes so far as to say we are nothing, completely worthless, before a holy God.For some reason, I have lately taken an interest in the study of worldviews and how they develop, particularly the North American Christian worldview. I think it is because I have become to realize how out of whack mine is. Or maybe it is because I think most other Christian's worldview is out of whack and I am resisting becoming one of them. Either way, I know I am going to be challenged and stretch. I think it is up to me how far I'll allow myself to go and that scares me because even though I like the idea of changing, I don't know how far I will allow myself to go.
This excessively negative view is not biblical, however, and it lays Christianity open to the charge that it has a low view of human dignity. The Bible does not begin with the Fall but with Creation: Our value and dignity are rooted in the fact that we are created in the image of God, with the high calling of being His representatives on earth. In fact, it is only because humans have such high value that sin is so tragic. If we were worthless to begin with, then the Fall would be a trivial event. When a cheap trinket is broken, we toss it aside with a shrug. But when a priceless masterpiece is defaced, we are horrified. It is because humans are the masterpiece of God's creation that the destructiveness of sin produces such horror and sorrow. Far from expressing a low view of human nature, the Bible actually gives a far higher view than the dominant secular view today, which regards humans as simply complex computers made of meat-products of blind, naturalistic forces, without transcendent purpose or meaning.
If we start with the message of sin, without giving the context of Creation, then we will come across to nonbelievers as merely negative and judgmental. After and extended trip through Africa (described in Dark Star Safari), the writer Paul Theroux said one of the saddest moments in his journey was "hearing a young woman [missionary] tell me that she was heading for Mozambique and adding, 'They're all sinners, you know.'" Theroux concluded that missionaries only make people "despise themselves."* We need to begin our message where the Bible begins-with the dignity and high calling of all human beings because they are created in the image of God.
Nancy Pearcey Total Truth: Liberating Christianity From Its Cultural Captivity. pg. 87-88.
*Paul Theroux, interview by Susan Olasky, "Agents of Virtue," World, March 15, 2003.
Anyhow, this quote is one example how Christians have wrongly have viewed humanity and sin through a distorted lens.
Saturday, November 11, 2006
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Rest
"Our hearts are restless until we find our rest in Him." Augustine. Confessions I.1
I have a lot of questions about rest. What is true rest? What is the rest that Augustine is talking about? I would assume it is a heart that is settled, or satisfied in being God's, in being His beloved. Something like that anyway. Is this rest something that is final? Do people who find this rest in Him always have it or does it come and go? Cause if I find it, I want to have it for ever.
I am scared of this rest, I think. I am scared that when I find it, that when my heart is no longer restless, I'll have no more ambitions or desires. Like right now I am thinking of my desire to be a paraglider pilot. Who knows when or if it happens but my life long dream has always been to fly and paragliding is the cheapest and a very exciting way to do it. I wonder if I desire to do it to fill some sort of void in life. That my desire to do it is an attempt too fill a void that only God can fill. I desire to have a rested heart but I am wondering if this is something I gotta give up in order to find my rest in Him. I hope not. I hope that I can have both. I am just not sure. But I wonder.
And I wonder why people who love God still seem to have something missing. The words to U2's "I still haven't found what I am looking for" are running through my head. Ok, I just re-read this paragraph and I should not have said "people who love God." Really, it is me who feels this way, that I still desire more of something. And I don't think I am alone. I think I desire more fulfillment, or happiness, or stuff. I don't know. I think this is my internal struggle between my "flesh" and God.
... I just took a couple of minutes to search the scriptures for the rest theme. Interesting truths in Hebrews:
1Therefore, since the promise of entering his rest still stands, let us be careful that none of you be found to have fallen short of it. 2For we also have had the gospel preached to us, just as they did; but the message they heard was of no value to them, because those who heard did not combine it with faith. 3Now we who have believed enter that rest, just as God has said,
"So I declared on oath in my anger,
'They shall never enter my rest.' "And yet his work has been finished since the creation of the world. 4For somewhere he has spoken about the seventh day in these words: "And on the seventh day God rested from all his work."5And again in the passage above he says, "They shall never enter my rest."6It still remains that some will enter that rest, and those who formerly had the gospel preached to them did not go in, because of their disobedience. 7Therefore God again set a certain day, calling it Today, when a long time later he spoke through David, as was said before:
"Today, if you hear his voice,
do not harden your hearts."8For if Joshua had given them rest, God would not have spoken later about another day. 9There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; 10for anyone who enters God's rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his. 11Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will fall by following their example of disobedience. (NIV)
I have a lot to learn about rest. It's been promised. That's sweet. Sounds to me like disobedience is a disqualifier. And sounds like it is important to God: "make every effort." I have experienced God's rest a few times. Really only one experience comes to mind at the moment. But it was sweet. Oh, and I think that rest is different than peace cause I have experienced God's peace a lot.
In a couple of weeks, Angela and I are going to spend a couple of nights away at a condo with two other pastor couples/friends of ours. One of the wives is going to share a few of her thoughts and a bit of her journey with rest and Sabbath. She is going to share a bit from Mark Buchanon's book: The Rest of God. I am looking forward to hear her story and then or course, reading the book for myself. Angela and I think we will read it together. We have heard that it is great.
So yeah, my heart is restless. I have found God, that is not the issue. It's that I want to find rest in Him.
