Thursday, September 07, 2006

Ooh La La

Know the song? I think you do. It's that song by Ronnie Wood & Ronnie Lane. I think the version you would know is the one covered by Rod Stewart in 2001. Still not sure? Try these lyrics: "I wish that I knew what I know now/when I was younger/ I wish that I knew what I know now/ when I was stronger. Ahhh yes. That's the one.

That is the tune that came to mind when I was laying in bed last night after I discovered this life changing formula I am about to tell you about.

Back story: I work with young people in various capacities as a pastor. I meet kids and strike up conversations. There are two things (among a lot of other things) that I like to find out about them: grade and age. I usually end up asking only one of the questions cause I don't want to come off that I am prying for information. When I see them again, I like to show that I was interested in them enough to remember their grade or age, but because I only asked one of the questions, I usually guess at the other and screw it up, or completely forget altogether. Ultimately, I look like a tool. Similarly, when I am talking to other people about youth events or what have you, they may say something like: "well, this conference is only for 13 and 14 year olds" in which I respond: "What grades would they be in then?" Thank-you mastercraft. . .

So, I was thinking about all this in bed last night when it hit me: All you gotta do when figuring out the ages of kids is take their grade and add 5 or 6 years! All you gotta do to figure out a kids grade is take their age and subtract 5 or 6 years! It looks like this:

age = grade + 5 or 6
or
grade = age - 5 or 6

You don't know how life changing this is for me! No more: "who's the idiot who has no idea how old I am" or "yeah, thanks for the card but I graduate next year."

I used to wonder when I would ever use algebra. Well, now I know!

Aspiring youth pastors: take note and never forget! It will save you years of grief.
Kids: stay in school!

And the song plays on . . . I wish that I knew what I know now, when I was younger . . .



2 comments:

Sheldon said...

Ok, I like your formula, but I just have one question: how do you know whether to add or subtract 5 years or 6 years? I'd hate to be off by a year because I didn't know. Does it have something to do with what month it is maybe? Or maybe I'm just really slow and the answer is obvious! (Wouldn't be the first time LOL)

Chris Hiebert said...

I'll assume they are the older of the two options. It is more flattering that way. Being off one year is infinitely better for me cause I am usually waaayyy off. Once youth starts up here in a few weeks, I'll but my new formula/theory to the test.